Snow is softly falling outside, and there has been no traffic on my street due to school being cancelled last night. The plows are waiting for it to stop. I think they are going to be waiting for a long time. 8" or so already, more to come. Then fifty degrees on Friday to peel it all off the pavement again. My kind of storm, really. 

Getting closer to finishing the current still life piece. Will be sure to dedicate some time to it today, on this magical free day. Working over every shape, adding detail in the form of couched gold cord, mirrors with what I am affectionately calling "Ropple-Shisha" and more beads and stitches throughout. This is the icing on the cake time, when my camera focuses in on detail, and I love this step. Because this is taking a long time, I have new ideas in the wings for the upcoming work I need to make, and know unconsciously I am solving design problems and making the pieces somewhere deep in my brain so the right ideas will come tumbling out when I start. Going to be an interesting few months!
​While my crew of birds, pups, and cats are patiently awaiting my ability to freely move my legs and feed them, I felt as if there was someone watching me. Outside my window is a snow covered philodendron limb that bears striking resemblance to an airedale dog. It gently bobs up and down as if it is asking to come in and get warm. Sorry, dear, the inn is full! The cats are being chased relentlessly by Teddie, who despite a few normal puppy offenses I refuse to see as anything but Perfect. Seamus has discovered the upper chamber to the kitty tower to escape her evil clutches, and Theo lounges on the table above the puppy zone, and has not been afraid of defending himself, gently, with his big, soft paw. He is a good kitty that has always been gentle with babies -- but this one is testing his patience!

Having a very bad time with my left leg and foot this morning, truly not weight bearing yet. Breathtaking jolts of pain when I try to stand on it or move my foot. The surprise of this pain caused me to fall when I stood up, and for once I found great value in having a pile of clean clothes on a table that I hadn't put away yet. Great cushioning! For the past few weeks the nerve pain in my left foot has woken me up several times a night, adding to the usual never-rested state of being.  I consider whether this extreme episode is caused by pinched nerves in my back, or pinched nerves from swelling in my ankle, or swollen joints in the midfoot, or all of these things. At the end of the day it doesn't really matter what causes it. I just want it to move along. Meds in, now I wait.

Dear Dad, I now know why you spent so much time off your feet. You were probably waiting for those few moments when you felt well enough to do something - anything. I can't believe you dealt with this scourge with only Aleve. It is the hardest fight of my life not to just give up and do the same. At times it seems pointless to even try to do anything but lay still in the least pain producing position I can find. But then I follow the thought to its consequence, and know that is no answer. Pushing through constant discomfort isn't a great answer either. 

Teddie just ran off with my shoe, or really HER shoe, as I only stole it back from her to wear this morning when I couldn't get my foot in my usual footwear.  She gleefully dragged it to the other room, stopping to stick her head inside and literally get lost in it. Be my guest, cutie. But can you please bring it back? She tilts her head as if to say "Come get it!" and she knows I will, albeit slowly today. Sweet puppy angel, I am besotted with you. We will get through this pain stuff, one gimpy step at a time. 

Must remember the power of baby steps in the fall...once the time changes here it is dark so early. Add to it a round of bleak, gray, wet weather, and a cold snap to boot, and the days just don't have much more in them than work. And puppies, always puppies. And parrots, and cats. Oh yeah, and a guinea pig.

Ellie da Pug has a cold, a pretty bad one, too. She is on antibiotics and will be having time in the bathroom with a vaporizer today to try to clear her stubby little airways. Because she can't smell well, she isn't excited about the little cheesebomb I give her with her pills in it, so has missed a couple doses over the past few days. Yesterday, Teddie was a shark and zoomed under Ellie's head to retrieve the dropped treat -- and consumed an NSAID. Amazing Carol let me know that she would be ok, and I gave her extra wet food to try to dilute it in her system. She was her perfect little self all day and night. Just perfect. 

This past week had me and the dogs staggering to bed "for a nap" earlier than I would like, and awaking somewhere around dawn wondering what the heck happened. I gave into sleep as my brain was so foggy and tired staying awake didn't make much sense. Used up all my mental energy at school, gritting teeth and ignoring a significant flare in my feet and legs, and digging deep into preparing quarterly grades and planning new projects. Never a shortage of distractions at school! That is a great thing. Tiring, though. I think I am coming out the other side of the tunnel -- with coffee, lots of coffee. 

The current piece has sat on the front table trying to get my attention through it all. "Hey, you!" "Over here!", "Ain't ya got five minutes?" it seems to grumble as I walk by it and leave it where it is. Thanksgiving break is coming, thankfully. Hang in there, bud. 

The house got a little needed organization and cleaning yesterday. I tackled the sewing room! Discovered that there were so many Homegoods bags filled with bits and pieces of the same thing that it is just a matter of organization. Tim found a terrific metal flat file-type cabinet being tossed out at work, so I had to reorganize all the furniture anyway. Got a new plant, threw out the dead spideys (sorry guys!) and best of all, hung a new shop light up last night so I can see what I am doing on the machine in its new location. Next will be the room I sleep in, as there is a real need for a similar treatment.  

Watch out, QC Auction, stuff is coming your way! For now things are filling up the back room, and it looks like hell, but I know it is temporary. I am at a point now where I am sorting things into zones -- upstairs is yarns, sewing room is fabrics, front room is beads, back room and kitchen is paper/cricut. My "sleep room" used to be the paper place, but is now drawing and painting supplies, but haphazardly organized in a panic when I was hospitalized last summer. When I think about it, I am living in my studio -- never mind a loft, this house IS an art space and just so happens to have a few residents. A living space needs to be useful...I will never be the type to have a gorgeously decorated living room that is never used. I am in awe of people who can do that, but know it isn't me. Too many interests, and with each, comes stuff. 

Concert tonight in Boston, early end thank GOD, and not a performer that makes me go gaga. I really like the music, but am not over the moon with idol worship, so it will be less stressful. I swear seeing Marc Almond contributed to the arthritis flare -- good stress is still stress! Lots on my plate for the next six months. The Boldishol Tapestry piece is due in June, the C&G coursework needs completing, and I have a series to make for the Library. Gotta be organized. Gotta be healthy. Gotta be rested. Gotta do art!

Veteran's Day...thank you to all who keep the world a better place, even when it is unpopular or difficult. Amen. 

Grateful for the day off and hoping to include a myriad of things that have waited impatiently on my lengthy to do list. Gathering legitimate dust, actually. My sewing room is inaccessible, and the hack I've used as a table for the past ten years is finally giving up. I'd balanced a hollow core door on two bookcases along one wall to have a nice long table that would allow me to draw, trace, cut, and have space for the computer and the cats. While excavating the room last night, I found that one book case has ruptured at the seams (thank you, kitty, for sharpening your claws on its cardboard backing...) and the "table" has bowed to the point of falling. Time to empty out the room and give it a good clean and reorganization...but when?  C'mon coffee!

Have to visit a laundromat today as well. The washer is coming next week, and thankfully the plumbing situation should be sorted by then. Apparently (but not surprisingly) the way it has been hooked up has been incorrect, and this will be fixed along with the bad hook up. God bless the plumber! Thank you, thank you, thank you...

The front room table that my friends and I gather around for class is heaped with a variety of art supplies and things that need to find new places to live. But where? When? Better be by Tuesday night, when they come over! 

Having lots of ankle trouble on both sides which is challenging. Which foot do you put weight on when they both are out of whack? The swelling is pretty consistent, and it is slowing me down, for sure. It isn't just the ankle as the tendons and ligaments that connect the ankle to the leg and foot are inflamed too. Trying not to say "uncle" and gag down a whopping dose of prednisone...but man it is tempting. It feels better to be off my feet, and the increased ouchies are energy draining, so I get more tired than usual.  When this first started years ago I went to a podiatrist who put me in a walking boot. Knowing that is the protocol and it is impossible to walk in two of those, and that there really isn't anything to do about this, I am not bothering to go. Even if there is a break in there somewhere, there isn't much to be done except resting it when possible. So, I look around me at all that needs to be done, and try to remain calm...lol...!

The current art piece for the course I am taking is moving along nicely, when I find time to work on it. I am delving into the nitty gritty of beading and loving it. Beads are the icing on the cake, adding light and reflection to the soft fabric and thread surface. So many kinds of beads to audition and use -- and I don't even need to go to Michaels as I *think* my bead hoarding has reached capacity and I have just about everything I'd use that they have. Is there such a thing as too many beads? Hmmm..

And finally, Teddie the puppy is turning out to be the most well behaved, lovely dog I could have ever hoped to have. She is affectionate, playful, obedient, and just so, so sweet. Her hair is growing rapidly and she looks like a mop head, but it is getting cold and she loves to run outside. Every day she is happy, and it is contagious. A definite angel, in the true sense of the word. 

​

The unicorn of all music events has now come and gone, and it was really special. None other than Marc Almond himself appeared at (of all places) The Paradise in Boston on Thursday night. To put the show in context, the last time I saw Marc play was in 2004 in London (during a trip just for that purpose.) His visits to the US are far and few between, and there is great inequity in his popularity here and in the rest of the world. I remember hearing his songs on the radio in Istanbul in the early 90's and being shocked -- that would never happen here. In America, he is sadly known as "that guy who sang Tainted Love." To the rest of the world, he is known as a prolific, multifaceted artist who fills concert halls and is considered a British National Treasure (awarded OBE, even!) And here he came to Boston, to a club only partially occupied by his die hard fans. As he hit the stage, he laughed and said "Maybe I should have told people I was coming!" and went forward to give us 110%. 

To say I enjoyed the show is a controlled understatement. The days leading up to it were filled with excitement as I made plans to also go to NYC to see him play in Brooklyn.  I had a car rental, a hotel, and was planning to meet someone at the show. Pre-RA, this would have been no problem. I wanted it to be no problem -- wanted it so, so much - that I fooled myself into thinking I could do it. 

But, leaving the Paradise, I found getting to the car was harder than I thought it would be. Standing for so long added to the leg and foot issues I normally have. Even Tim said his legs hurt as a result of the long standing time. Once home, I begrudgingly logged in online and cancelled my reservations, knowing the worst would be coming the next day. Thankfully, I planned for it, and accommodated the painful reaction to what most people would find unbelievable. Was it worth it to feel this bad after a concert? Yes! But, I am very disappointed in not being able to get to show #2, and to know that those days are most likely officially over. I used to be able to do a Boston to NYC RT in a day. Not anymore.  At least I could see Marc Almond play Boston, for what might be the first and last time, ever. Be still my heart! 

During the show Marc played one song from his upcoming album called Chaos and the Dancing Star. As always, his writing tends to reflect something in my own life, and offer perspective.  While I don't know the entire song yet, it's chorus is about having the world seem to fall down around us all, and how we've got to embrace the chaos. Truth be told, as I look around my house and know that now that the concert (and forgone travel plans) are over I have to deal with the broken washer, the pipe issue, the yard, and many more things that need doing. Thanks to Marc Almond's beautiful vocals and insightful writing, that becomes a whole lot easier. Art has to be on the menu, too. Every time I think he has released his last album, there is another. Every time I think I have seen him for the last time, he pops up again, wearing new found creative excitement and revealing another side to his complex artistry. What inspiration! Cheers. 

Teddie is three months old today, and full of it! Whether she is nipping at fingers, playing Godzilla by jumping on my face when I lay down, or pulling out clumps of my ever thinning hair, she is a happy, healthy puppy full of life and love. So much what I needed at this point in my life. She has worked her way into Ms. Ellie's heart, or at least her bed, and is very responsive to the older dog's direction when the playing is a little too manic or rough. She immediately flattens out like a tiny polar bear rug and waits until she can safely strike again. She is excellent at finding corners of my home that need domestic attention (and there are many right now) and investigating them like a golden retriever. She brings me lost things that she finds -- two pens, a pair of reading glasses, a napkin, a paintbrush, and a paper towel roll have quietly appeared at my feet as I type this. Maybe she is telling me to get cleaning? At last -- I have a helper with my inability to pick up things I drop. At least I know she is developing a healthy immune system!  Ah, puppyhood! 

School is great and I truly love my classes this year. The kids are just so respectful and open to playfully learning, and for the most part, are doing their middle school bests. Some years are less cohesive than others -- this one is terrific. I started using Zippy (the Mobility Scooter) at school this week and the kids are great about it. They want rides and to "pimp it out" -- one suggestion was to print "Ropple Rollenator" on the back of the seat. I'll pass on that, but my Cricut might be involved in some cool modifications at some point.

Using Zippy to scoot home at lunch to check on puppy has made me realize how much difficulty and pain I've had walking for the past several years. Because of the foot/ankle/leg pain and numbness, I've been looking down at my feet while walking, trying to avoid a stumble. Hadn't realized this until I was cooking along on Zippy at a stunning 5mph and able to look UP -- at trees, the sky, houses, etc. And do it without the constant stabbing pain of walking. I don't need to use it all the time, but can see it is beneficial. Will take a while to get the balance right of when to walk vs. ride, I think. 

I still feel VERY self conscious when riding it as it just seems weird to me, but this really just makes me question my own reaction to people with disabilities that I've seen out and about. It is a truly unconscious reaction of seeing someone who uses a mobility aid as "different" in such a basic way that the difference becomes more exaggerated in importance than it really is.  Food for thought. 

Yesterday I taught my first class at Michaels on using the Cricut Maker! While it would have been much better if the internet had worked more consistently and if my laptop recognized the maker as it did at home, it was still okay. Repeating the class today and am looking forward to working out the kinks! The machine is amazing and I have yet to tap all of its possibilities. Where are the extra 8 hours a day that I need so desperately? 

This weekend will be spent making Teddie's home more habitable, giving her another much needed bath, and hopefully getting in some art time to get the beading on the current piece underway. I can't wait for that step! Hope everyone is getting their creativity on as the colder air comes in, and our step towards hibernation begins. Bring on the beads!

Teddie is only here for two weeks, and she broke already! Yesterday when I took her for a short walk up the street with her Maltese friends, she seemed fine and was happily snuffling through the leaves at the edge of the sidewalk. She was doing puppy zoomies, with little growls of excitement, as she zipped ahead on the leash, and then....the scream. It was a very big scream for a little puppy! I looked at her foot to see if she stepped on anything and then whisked her home. Her front left foot was limp and she was in obvious pain, whining and whimpering as though her leg was severed. It has to be broken, I thought. But how? Huh? The reaction was similar to when Tilly dislocated his hip!

Anne came over with a little ice pack and held her while I called around to find a vet that could see her. I know Carol wasn't open, but I tried anyway out of habit and because I was freaking out and I love Carol. Then I tried two more local vets, and Reading Animal Clinic said to bring her right in. They whisked her in the back and when the nice vet came out to tell us it was a bee sting, and that her little eyes were puffing up too, we all cheered. Steroid shot and benadryl, and all is well. What a scare! 

Oh, puppies.  Puppyhood is tough for all of us!

She has learned how to be a good puppy and self-soothe with toys rather than crying anxiously for help, which I think is the best thing ever. She now has the run of the front room with Ellie (sorry, Ellie!) and for the most part is wee wee pad trained. She is up to 3 whole lbs now, too, so is eating well and growing normally. She loves to snuggle and play at bedtime, but settles in pretty quickly for a good night's sleep. Overall, I think I am the luckiest person in the world to have come across this little lady and have her here. She is a dream! 

A dream that will be fashionable, it seems, as on Friday my work friend Bob left me a massive bag of costumes and clothing for little girl dogs. Every holiday is accounted for, in addition to various weather conditions. She will need her own wardrobe for all this stuff!! I think, now, she might be a bee for Halloween! 

I did manage to move my art piece along this week, still at the stitching stage, and more ideas for some elaborate couching are on deck. It just will take time. I have to accept that new motherhood will have an impact on my art -- though she is great about chilling out when I work, so I really can't blame her. It is more my health that causes delays. Extreme fatigue at the end of the day. So heavy that I don't even eat dinner -- I feed the pets and go to bed. At 6:30! And sleep all night. Or, just high pain levels all over that preempt an evening's work. Sucks, really. It will get better, booked for a Remicade infusion soon, and I hope it will do SOMETHING, even though it seems like it doesn't. 

One foot in front of the gimpy other, I guess! Cheers. 

She is here! She is here! Right now she is playing quietly by herself in her little pen, sitting so she can keep an eye on me as I wake up with a cup of coffee at 5 am. What a doll. As my mother would have said about her, she is a real "doll baby." She weighed in at a stunning 2.8lbs and has captured the love of everyone who has seen her. She trots along by my feet like a little butterfly, is cuddly, is smart, and is just a wonderful puppy. I couldn't be more blessed. She is already using the wee wee pad (most of the time!) and doesn't bark much (yet...) She does bay like a tiny little wolfie when she wants attention and I can't give it to her right away, but that is normal. Hapi will be baying like said wolfie before long. When I think of all that could have arrived on Saturday, and see this canine perfection, I can not help but feel happy. 

Happy? Whaaaat's that? Only sort of kidding, here. The Struggle of Life has been a doozy for the past few years with health and other issues. When Tilly passed the door kinda slammed shut on that feeling, as he was the one who kept me connected to uncontrolled joy. The last little thread of happy in my life. Every time I looked at that dog he would smile back with his eyes and be pure love and joy. Now, I've noticed that I can look at Teddie and the same feeling is starting to creep back into my heart again. She is so little and funny, it is impossible not to feel love for her. She looks at me (and everything) with such amazement and wonder, and has no clue what our hopefully long adventure will look like. I don't either, but am happy to give it a go! My little angel. 

The cats are figuring things out, slowly. Uncle Theo rests by Teddy's pen all day, pretending not to care about the puppy like a Real Cat should, but lifting his head to look if her squeals and yips are louder than normal. He is a mothering kitty who used to clean Seamus when he was a kitten, and I can trust him 100% with the birds. He is wonderful. Seamus, on the other hand, feels like our "pack" has been disrupted and is causing trouble. He ran into the kitchen and bulldozed Theo yesterday in a menacing way, prompting a hissy fit on behalf of both angry cats. Their relationship is tenuous on a normal day, and puppy has rocked the leaking boat. On the bright side, I woke up at 1 am with both cats sleeping on the bed with the puppy, so there is hope! As always, I feel optimistic that the dust will settle and everyone will get along. 

Ellie has started to be stiff and somewhat lame sometimes in her hind quarters. Her vet thinks it is a neurological degenerative problem, with an inflammatory component. She struggles on stairs and stumbles from time to time, and is very stiff upon waking. Like me! She is on a trial of meds (one of which I take, too!) and seems to be a bit more comfortable. Will know when I spend more time with her this weekend. She is nearly 14, and I can't help but fear the worst for my old girl. I want her to live forever as she has been such a good doggie. 

On the art front, things are bustling! STILL working on the current still life piece that I like very much, and hope to get the bead step started this weekend. Really looking forward to that. It needs more surface texture on top of the stitching. I've got a name for the piece now (not telling) and see how future pieces can relate. Love being in this spot. If only I had more healthy time.

I am working with a lovely lady at the Reading Public Library to set up an exhibit there next year. The current series I am making will fit nicely in a library context. If I can get the work done! And, there is the piece for the Norwegian museum I signed up to make based on an important historical weaving, and and and.  Am cutting lots of stencils on the cricut for gelli printing, and have set up a gelli print area in my classroom for kids to explore, too. This week most of the 7th grade is away on a nature-based field trip and the remaining kids are regrouped for nature-related workshops here. I am giving them a crash course in gelli printing with leaves -- and it is a blast! At least for me! Some kids get it right away, others will need more play time. Looks like I will need to start hoarding small bottles of acrylic for the kids to use. So much art, so little time! 

Onward to feeding Ellie da Pug wet dog food by hand (this is a new wrinkle) and of course, giving the baby the hundred kisses she needs every day. Cheers! 

Home from school and do not have my Amazing Ladies for class tonight, so am having a quick cuppa coffee before getting all that needs to be done, done. Quite a list with the puppy coming on Saturday! Boil the water! Get the cigars! Where's my breathing coach? I can't really believe that I am getting another golden opportunity to share my life with a very special dog. Yes, I predict miserable heartbreak at some point on this journey, and am still feeling it whenever I think of my Tilman. Whether I jump in the maltese pool again or not does not bring Til back, though, and I think in a weird way I'm respecting him by doing this again. I learned so much about what not to do with a puppy because of Tilly, and will never ever stop wishing he was right here by my side. Maybe he is, in another dimension, and I'll get to see him again someday. I can't imagine a better eternity than being surrounded by all my fur and feather babies. Sure hope so! Until then, furry white bum on the bed #2 is coming in four days and my heart is starting to get ready and welcome this little love. OMG the cuteness hurts. 

School is off to a really terrific start. I am so, so pleased with the classes this year. Very manageable sizes, which translates to more focus for the kids and better teaching for me. Each class is showing its own personality and so far, all are more than enjoyable. At the end of the day I am exhausted and my legs and feet are miserable, but I have to say I am truly happy and doing what I love to do. The kids are just wonderful. Love every one of them and to have the opportunity to help them discover art is The Best!

On the art front, I am getting my skates back on with my current still life piece, which was supposed to be done over the summer, but has gotten placed on the back burner behind much needed sleep, school, health, and other nonsense. Am on the embroidery stage now, and can't wait to get to the beads! SO many ideas, here. I see where this piece is leading in terms of the next work I make, too...a series is born! Having the ability to make fabric is changing my game and I really do feel like this is a pivotal change in direction, here, that is tying up some loose threads from previous endeavors. Once puppy comes, we will spend time together stitching and playing, simultaneously! Wait...can I stitch and cuddle her at the same time? 

So soon after seeing Squeeze so many times in August, which was heavenly, a truly unbelievable musical opportunity has shown up in the form of Marc Almond playing the Paradise in Boston. The last time I saw Marc sing was when I went to London to do just that, and saw five of six sold out performances at a little club in Islington. It was amazing, emotional, and brilliant, and I have no doubt that this will be the same. I've driven to Philly and NYC to see him over the years and have not regretted any of the travel -- he is that good. A legend. I can not believe he is coming here and will actually grace the stage in Boston. Get out the tissues, his voice is the most emotional and beautiful sound for the soul. A real diva / torch singer / vocal musician. I can not wait. I keep pinching myself and thinking it is a dream that he is coming! 

Add to this that I recently completed a restructuring of my finances to allow for a less stressful life and better tax status. A life reset, really. New puppy, new art, Marc Almond, wonderful job -- if only I could get new legs! Guess that would be greedy! Cheers. 

Brrrr...chilly! That is me saying this, not Hapi this time. Wonderful sleeping weather, and I made the best use of it. On deck today is getting the house ready for the arrival of The Puppy, Teddie, who will be here in two weeks. It doesn't seem real yet, and while I know I will be thrilled when she arrives, I am still missing my little man. It's been less than three months since he passed and I am still feeling it. I'm sure that Teddie will be a welcome distraction from the loss. She is a beautiful pup! And thanks to my dear friends, she has a lovely ball gown to wear when needed...omg. It is purple. 

On the art front, I am still pecking away at the stitching stage of my current large piece. It is verrrrry different for me and I look forward to the hubub of the start of the school year to wind down so I can really hone in on what it needs. More stitching, and most important, BEADS. Oh, the embellishment possibilities that exist with this one. I can see where this piece will lead to the next, so feel good it is well underway. It is a final piece for the coursework I was supposed to complete over the summer, so it had best get done soon! Yikes. 

Survived another birthday, and have reached the ripe age of 52 now, which for some reason I never thought would happen when I was young. Still seems funny to be in my fifties. My attitude gets younger as I get older, I think. Good old John Denver has said it best, as always...give a listen to Poems, Prayers, and Promises...it's all in there.  The world gets smaller, but it is okay.

The roughness of this past summer taught me a lot about letting go of personal expectations, and trying to focus on keeping the RA in check as best as I can. The start of the school year is always ushered in with an uptick of symptoms, and this is no exception. Examining the visual state of my ankles and ret hot, swollen feet at the end of a day, and evaluating the pain level in my lower extremities throughout the day, I've come to a point that I can't ignore. Walking is hard, now. Every step. All day. Whatever damage has occurred to the soft tissues and joints in my feet, ankles, and knees, and lower legs is making quick jaunts nearly impossible. There, I said it. I can putter in my house, and walk in my classroom (limited steps in every direction, can lean and sit as needed), but walking with fast purpose to get to another classroom, the office, or even exit for a fire drill, is challenging and pain inducing. 

I've made a decision to accept this. Not fight it as I always have, not prove to myself that I was stronger than the pain. Denial isn't working anymore. Along with my birthday comes my RA Anniversary of seventeen years, and I'm quite satisfied that I've been able to hold off on an option like this for so long. 

I am getting a Pee Wee Herman Mobility Scooter to assist me in my speed-required jaunts around the building, and even to get my fat arse to and from school (I hate driving my car 300 steps!) It isn't that I CAN'T walk, it is that it hurts too much most of the time, and this is a solution. I will walk my puppy after school, on a nice long leash so she can run, but I can take my time doing so (unlike trekking around the building, pounding on the concrete.) Hopefully by reducing the pain throughout the day I can conserve a little energy so that my life can have more balance. This "going to bed at 7 thing" is getting very old. Especially when I can't sleep, but the legs are too painful to do anything else. 

And, I need more art time! Lots more! So many pieces to make! Be well.
​

Well, it is here. The final day of summer break. Due to some things that had to get done at the start of this week, I was unable to go to school early to get the classroom set up, and had planned on using today. Sadly (?) we received word that the building would be closed all day today, so I will be able to work from home which is nice. But, here it is, the very end. The beach calls. I might have to listen. 

As expected the summer flew by and I watched all good plans go bouncing by the car window like a tossed piece of litter on the highway.  If I had to grade myself on my fulfilling my summer plans, I'd have to go with a big fat "D" or lower. Good thing I don't have to grade myself, then! As with any failure, there are surprise silver linings, and these are mine: 

a) My house is clean(er). Due to my friends' help and a foot-breaking 48 hours of hell this week, my house is ready for the onslaught of Fall. Sort of, as well as it can be!
b) I learned how to nap without guilt. I've always been a napper, but with inner reservation. This summer, after starting it off with a hospital stay, I had no choice but give into the restorative power of sleep. I literally had no choice, and have learned to actually savor the ability to spend quality time with Ellie da Pug doing what she loves best (besides visiting her doggie friends, that is.) 
c) My Patreon is not gone or forgotten, just on hold. Not the right time to do that yet, if I want to do it right. That's okay. 
d) I didn't do enough art this summer, and that has to be alright. I love the piece I am working on, but I have to accept the limitations life threw at me this summer. It will be back on track soon, and there are many ideas in the pipeline following the current piece. Small steps forward are still steps. 
e) I learned my favorite thing to do on the beach. I have my chair, my English paper piecing bag, and my cluster of seagulls facing Hampton's ocean during the late afternoon through sunset. Heavenly. Add to it my paper piecing at bedtime and I might someday have a quilt on my hands! Or lap.
f) SQUEEZE! Having four local shows to attend is a luxury awarded to few. Thank you, my angels, for this joy. 
g) I faced the moment that I've been dreading for years -- losing my best canine pal has hovered over my head like a black cloud. What would I ever do without his little joyful self in my life?  Just knowing I survived this loss makes me realize I am tougher than I think - no drama, here, just this dog was extremely important to me. And now "IT" has happened and is over. And...
h) Sometimes a puppy helps. Just like when food is unappetizing after being ill, the thought of a new puppy seems impossible after losing one so special. But then the heart gets hungry again, and needs a place to throw all that love that has nowhere to go without the lost cherished pet. Coming soon...the whole mixed bag experience of a new bundle to love. Will never be my Tilman, but she will be her own adorable self. 
i) Forgiveness matters. I was thrown for a major loop recently when I found out something that revealed a betrayal by the people closest to me. It was devastating to experience this. I do know, though, that  holding on to that sense of devastation and throwing away friendships in spite isn't the way to go. 
j) I am looking forward to a new school year, with terrific kids and all the fun, creativity, and challenges they bring.  We only have about 182+/- days to do this -- game on! 

That's enough self reflection on this summer. The end. Cheers and happy creating, peeps!